Currently|Volume 4

It’s a little disappointing that I can’t maintain a constant time where I publish contents for this blog series. I get that I get so busy and lazy at times to even care to look at the updates in this blog, but it’s just odd that sometimes I feel like I don’t even care. Not just for my blog but in general, I don’t care.

This passed few weeks (or maybe even months?) I’ve been feeling so messy, not just in a superficial way but deep within my inner thoughts. My mind is all over the place, I can’t focus, I can’t seem to find any motivation to be very productive in my days. Yes, I do get up everyday and go on my day, socialize with people, paint a smile on my face, but I just know there’s something missing in myself that I couldn’t figure out. I always feel tired even after a long nap. I don’t find myself crying in bed at night anymore like what I used to do, which was my good way of releasing stress. But I know I am sad and very unmotivated. Maybe I finally got used to being this sad that it doesn’t affect me anymore. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

But I hope everything gets a little better from now on because the semester is finally done. I get to take my mind and myself off from one of many stressful things. I think I just have to train myself to focus more on the positive things in my life rather than on those that makes my inner peace suffer and then it’ll get better. I’ll eventually master that kind of mindset. Slowly. But for now, I got to vent all these thoughts that I’ve been meaning to get off from my mind.

CURRENTLY…

Reading

Some old conversations threads with people that I miss.

Writing

Nothing except this blog which I am so upset about because writing used to be the only thing that keeps my mind off from so many things. But right now, I am feeling so lazy, unmotivated and tired.

Listening

Now playing: The Only Exception by Paramore.

Thinking

about how busy I am going to be this coming week. I hope I accomplish all my plan without hassle. I got to be productive!

Smelling

these bunch of marshmallows that I am eating as I write this blog post LOL.

Wishing

that I have more food for me to eat right now. I’m soo hungryyy.

Hoping

for my upcoming trip next week to go smoothly and fun. I hope that we don’t come across lots of problem as our trip goes. I won’t hope for it to go as planned coz i know it wouldn’t, but I hope it goes as close to how we planned it to happen.

Wearing

A pink Hello Kity pajama shorts and my work shirt that I am too lazy to change from. I probably would just sleep in it too lol.

Loving

that I’ve been getting enough sleep these past few days since I’m in my break from school. I almost forgot how nice it feels to get at least 7 hours of good night sleep lol. (Same as my previous blog coz same feeling! LOL)

Wanting

some avocado shake from Quickly!!!

Needing

some rest and vacation which I will be getting soon next month!! Thank you Lord! It’ll help me feel sooo much better. I think I deserve it since I had been working my ass off in my classes just to get good grades.

Feeling

Althought, I feel lazy and unmotivated right now. I am also feeling extremely excited about the trip OMG. I will try my best to document (via lots of pictures and videos) all the things that we will be doing because I want to preserve the memories as much as I can. Also I will force myself to not be lazy and make a blog post about it.

Spread love, people! ♥

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